


Working Out

by veryveryverytemporarily



Category: Emmerdale, robron
Genre: Angst, Bisexuality, Coming Out, Fluff, M/M, Smut, referenced self harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-21
Updated: 2016-08-27
Packaged: 2018-08-10 03:09:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7828165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/veryveryverytemporarily/pseuds/veryveryverytemporarily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aaron has started working out, but boyfriend Robert suspects his motives. So what could be troubling Aaron and will Robert find the answer?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Thursday

Aaron moved the pin down, increasing the weight. He lay down again on his back on the bench and taking hold of the bar he pulled down slowly. The sweat stung his eyes as he breathed in. When he released the bar again, his arms continued to shake and he closed his eyes, licking the salt from his lips, waiting for the heat to subside.

He’d started going to the gym a few weeks back, now. Working out helped him to focus on the here and now, helped him to relax. There was a level that he knew he had to check himself. The temptation to push too hard, stay too long. The pain barrier was such a seduction. Pain, his old dysfunctional friend.

Robert had watched him silently when he’d first started going, while he packed a sports bag with his gym kit and fastened up the zip.

‘It makes me feel good.’

‘I thought I did that.’

Aaron raised his chin and gave a short laugh.

‘When you were running…’

‘It’s not the same, it makes me feel good.’ He said again.

‘You feel good to me whatever.’

He liked the way he felt pumped afterwards, how the muscles on his chest would swell. His biceps would ache when he reached out, his thighs felt tighter under his jeans.

He liked Robert’s hand, cool fingers spread over the curve of his chest when they lay in bed after he came home, the palm of his hand touching against a nipple, then, later, his mouth biting down against him.

He’d started with Monday and Wednesday after work, then added Thursday. When Robert saw him packing his bag again, he spoke quietly.

‘What is it? Is it me?’

Aaron frowned back at him.

‘Cos I thought we were alright.’

‘We are.’  Aaron zipped up the bag. ‘Why does everything have to be about you? I’m fine. I just enjoy it, right? Stop weirding out about it.’

 

There was a hen party in the pub. All miniskirts and cleavages, glossy hair and handbags. Aaron didn’t notice until he followed the direction of Robert’s eyes.

‘Go and join them if you like.’

‘You what?’

‘I saw you.’

‘Don’t be ridiculous.’

One of the girls came up to the bar to buy a drink, standing next to Robert, too close for Aaron’s liking, flashing her heavily mascaraed eyes. He picked up his glass and turned the other way.

‘Your mate’s fit.’ She said to Robert, curving back to get a better look. ‘Do you think he’d buy me a drink?’

Robert laughed.

‘He is, isn’t he? But I doubt it. He’s already spoken for.’

The girl looked around.

‘Where is she then?’ She asked. ‘Did she go to the ladies? Cos finders keepers!’ Robert smirked into his drink, while the girl looked at him more closely.

‘You could buy me a drink then?’

He shook his head.

‘I’m spoken for too.’

The girl walked away, having paid for her own drink. Robert watched her go with a small amused shake of the head. But Aaron’s eyes told a different story.

‘Why didn’t you just tell her?’ He tipped up his glass to drain the pint he was drinking.

‘Tell her what?’

‘That you’re gay. That I’m gay? That we’re boyfriends?’

Robert blinked.

‘I didn’t need to.’ He answered confused. ‘What’s it to her, anyway?’

Aaron nodded.

‘What?’ Robert asked

Aaron put down his empty glass.

‘I don’t know what goes on in that head of yours, do I?’ He said and turning, walked away from Robert into the back room, leaving Robert blinking after him.

Robert finished his drink, then followed him. He found Liv in the kitchen.

‘He went upstairs in a right strop. Did you two have a row or something?’ She asked.

 

Aaron was lying on his back on the bed in the dark. The curtains were open, the light from the street lamps and the village casting shadows in the room. Robert could see Aaron’s eyes were open, the whites shining as they flickered over him when he entered the room, then looking away. He sat on the side of the bed next to him.

‘What did I do? You don’t exactly like getting all touchy feely in front of other people. I’m just trying to follow your lead on that.’ Robert said. ‘I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, that’s all. But if I’m getting it wrong…’

‘It’s not that.’ Aaron’s voice was low in the dark.

‘Then what? What do you want me to do, to say?’

Aaron felt his heart thump, watching Robert’s face, his cheek bones and jaw accentuated in the half-light.

‘I don’t know.’ He lied, breathing out, knowing the moment was gone, half relieved, half disappointed.

‘How about I love you, Aaron Dingle.’

Aaron shook his head and smiled.

‘I guess that’ll do, for now.’

‘Come here, then.’

Aaron shifted up to a sitting position and felt Robert’s arms circle his waist, his hands reaching up to his shoulders in a caress. He slipped his own arms around Robert too, and leaned his chin on his shoulder. They breathed against each other, just holding on in the dark.

‘You’re all I want.’ Robert whispered in his ear. ‘Just you.’

Aaron blinked over his shoulder. It wasn’t exactly the words he was waiting for from Robert, but he would take it.

‘Let’s go down and eat.’ Robert said.

But Aaron kept a hold on him.

‘Are you sure you want to eat now?’

He could feel Robert grin, even if he couldn’t see him.

‘You had something else in mind?’


	2. Monday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Robert accompanies Aaron

Robert likes surfaces.

He likes angles. He uses the surfaces as leverage and changes the angles up, ninety degrees, forty five degrees, a hundred and eighty, and then all the different degrees in between.

There’s Aaron’s bed. Robert likes to tug his body till he’s over the edge. Or to bend him against the tall chest of drawers in the room, stroking the flat of his hand down over Aaron’s back while Aaron holds on to the silky wood, watching himself reflected in the oval mirror.

Adam comments on how Robert keeps his desk at the portacabin so clear, just his laptop, tidying away any debris in his drawer, pinning up charts and calendars on the cork board on the wall. Such a contrast to the scrapyard lads. Aaron looks at the desk silently and pulls his mouth down in agreement, as if he’s only just noticed.

‘He’s so anal, that boyfriend of yours.’ Adam noted to Aaron, and then blinked rapidly, hearing himself. ‘I mean… I don’t mean… He’s just so tidy. It’s not human, man.’

Robert likes to stand, pulling Aaron’s thigh high up around his waist, and then both thighs, leaning his back against the wall, holding him in his open hands, before he gets too heavy and they move back onto the bed.

When it’s Aaron’s turn, Robert lies on his side and Aaron reaches a hand around his front, stroking his stomach, while the other hand opens him up, measuring his breath, asking in a whisper if he’s ready.

He knows he’s Robert’s first like that. First time, first boyfriend, first love, well maybe, only love maybe. Hopefully. He’s not sure about Robert, but he knows that’s what he wants.

But it’s not too long till Robert gets adventurous, and they’re back to surfaces and angles again.

 

Now in the dark room, Aaron felt his breath catch as he leaned forward and raised his arms while Robert pulled off his T-shirt over his head. Robert didn’t wait. He unbuttoned just the top buttons of his shirt and peeled himself out of it so that Aaron could already smell how much he wanted him.

He placed his hands either side of Aaron’s face and then ran them down over his shoulders, over his arms, noticing the swell of his biceps.

He moved a hand to Aaron’s stomach, feeling the new muscles there.

‘So, do I worry?’

‘You what?’ Aaron didn’t want to talk. He was already looking for Robert’s mouth with his own.

‘Well, you seem to be attracting attention.’

‘Don’t be a Muppet.’

Robert pushed him back and stripped him down.

He gasped as Robert bent over him, his mouth playing over his shaft, his hands pressing down on his shaking thighs. Then Robert’s mouth moved downwards.

 He stood back, lifting both of Aaron’s legs up high. In the dark Aaron heard the zip unfastening, he felt Robert’s fingers and the cold lube and then Robert, rock hard, unceremoniously, entering deep inside him with one single movement.

Ninety degrees.

Robert’s fingers dug into Aaron’s calves as he held his legs high against his shoulders. Aaron felt his newly stretched muscles from the work out that evening ache.

Robert’s voice was low, full of gravel as he slowed right down.

‘Aaron. I’m close.’

He closed his eyes.

‘Me too.’

For a moment his mind wandered. He couldn’t doubt this. He just wanted to hear it that’s all. He wasn’t sure why it mattered, but it did.

When Robert started to move again, Aaron felt himself hurtling like a launched satellite gradually lost from gravity.

He heard Robert, repeating his name.

 

On Monday, when Aaron packed his bag, Robert pulled out his pale blue T-shirt and some running shorts Aaron hadn’t seen before and started to pack a sports bag of his own.

Aaron stopped, watching him sorting out the laces on a brand new pair of sports shoes.

‘What are you doing?’

‘I thought I could come with you.’

‘You’re joking.’

‘Well. If you don’t want me?’

They looked at each other searchingly and Robert dropped the bag.

‘You don’t want me.’

Aaron touched his elbow.

‘No. Fine. Come. It’ll be… different.’ He nudged him with his shoulder. ‘And I need to see you in those shorts.’

The changing rooms were crowded. Now that Robert was there, for the first time Aaron noticed lads with broad necks and six packs and thick thighs, the smell of sweat, the sound of running water from the shower. He looked at Robert and smiled weakly, checking the direction of his eyes.

When Robert wore his shorts, Aaron glanced around to check that no one else was looking their way. Robert unbuttoned his shirt and took it off, Aaron stood by him until he’d pulled his T-shirt on over his head.

They stepped into the hall, water bottles in hands. It was even more packed than the changing rooms, lads and lasses on the treadmills and cross trainers and weights machines.

‘It’s the after work rush.’ Aaron explained.

‘So, do we wait?’ Robert asked, looking at his watch.

Aaron closed an eye and pointed, leaning close.

‘Look. There’s some free mats. We can do some push-ups, stomach crunches.’

‘We can do those at home for free.’ Robert pointed out, but followed Aaron anyway.

They started with sit ups. Aaron was fast. Robert gave up and sat up next to him, looking around. Aaron stopped, already sweating, eyes laughing.

‘Come on!  I’ll help.’

He held Robert’s knees, fingers open against his skin and counted, until Robert shook his head and lay back, elbows bent, hands behind his head.

Aaron kept a hand on his knee and bit his lip, looking round, looking back at Robert, at the sweat marks already forming on his T-shirt.

‘I’m glad you came.’

‘You sure about that?’

‘Well, what else would I do for entertainment?’ He answered. Patting his knee, he moved his hand away.

He pointed out a weights machine that had come free.

They walked over. It involved squeezing weights between the thighs.

‘You’ll be good at this.’ Aaron winked.

He watched Robert sit back, legs spread, running shorts riding up. Aaron looked around, wetting his lips.

‘Next time, wear sweat pants, eh?’

‘So there’ll be a next time?’

‘If you want.’

Robert smiled.

Aaron noticed a vacant treadmill.

‘I’ll er go there then. You keep going.’

 

Aaron ran. He pulled out his phone and earphones and found a play list, putting his phone back in his pocket. He felt light. He felt he could run for a long time, energy coursing through his limbs. Perhaps this was the first time he’d really enjoyed working out since he’d started coming. All his demons forgotten.

When he looked up, he saw Robert had moved. He was waiting by the cross trainers.

Then all at once there was a commotion. A lad gesturing angrily, a lass standing nearby.

Aaron pulled out his earphones, slowing suddenly so he had to grip the rail to stop himself being thrown off backwards.

The lad grabbed Robert by the neck of his T-shirt.

Aaron rushed over. He placed a hand between them, pushing against the lad’s chest. Looking at Robert’s face with confusion, then back.

‘Mate! Mate! Just calm down and walk away, eh?’

‘He was hitting on my girlfriend.’

Aaron relaxed suddenly.

‘You’re wrong. You’ve got it all wrong. He doesn’t fancy your bird, mate. He's my boyfriend. He’s gay.’

He watched the lad's face as he inclined his head towards him, but kept his eyes on Robert. His fingers slowly uncurling from his hold on Robert’s T-shirt.

Then Robert blinked.

‘I’m… I’m not gay.’

Aaron’s mouth opened. He raised his hands, covering his head and turned away for only a moment.

Turning back he was in time to see the lad’s fist landing heavily on Robert’s face.


	3. The Days of the Week

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW more implied self harm through over exercise but a happy ending

They hadn’t spoken for days.

 Well, correction, Aaron hadn’t spoken for days.

Robert kept turning up, starting his appeal. ‘Aaron, please! Why won’t you… ‘  and Aaron kept walking away. He watched the bruise around Robert’s eye transform from scarlet lidded and swollen, to black with purple edges.

At the pub, his Mum provided the first line of defense. Back squared and lips curled, she ran him out of the family rooms. Aaron stood behind her, leaning back against the kitchen counter, arms folded, looking up at the ceiling, looking away.

‘He doesn’t want to see you. Can’t you get the message and jus’ get lost?’

Liv sat at the breakfast table, eyeing them both silently.

‘Liv…’ Robert started.

‘No you don’t do that!’ Chas was quick to counter attack. ‘You don’t involve Liv in this! Don’t you even dare!’

Charity lived up to her name, serving him pint after pint, and then whiskey, as he stood brooding, propping up the bar, and later, when he was no longer confident about standing, sitting at one of the round tables, keeping an eye on the entrances and exits.

Once, Aaron came through behind the bar and grabbed a packet of crisps, looking nervously over his shoulder. Their eyes met and Robert opened his mouth to speak, but Aaron lowered his gaze and he was gone.

At the scrapyard every day Robert sat at his desk, hopeful of seeing him, but Aaron found every excuse to stay away, not showing at all or taking the pick- up truck long distances for collections.

Robert tried not to panic but he could feel himself retreating. The forgotten scripts from the old Robert starting to play out in his head.

He crashed at Vic’s, borrowing spare pyjamas from Adam.

‘So I’ll ask Aaron for your clothes when I do my shift, then,’ Vic had suggested, ‘Adam’s not so hot on sharing, you know, sibling stuff and that.’

Robert looked up at her from the sofa, one eye closed to just a thin line from the swelling.

‘No… don’t do that. It’s just a misunderstanding, that’s all.’

‘So what did you do?’

Robert ran a hand through his hair.

‘Nothing! Why does everybody assume that I’d have done something?’

Later, she asked again.

‘You must have done something.’

‘I’m trying to work it out. We went to the gym. I think, he thinks I tried to pull a lass.’

‘Well that’s not very likely.’

‘Her boyfriend thought so.’ Robert pointed at his eye.

 

Aaron opened the wardrobe to get his sports bag. He kept his eyes lowered, trying to avoid the sight of Robert’s shirts hanging there. The material trailed over his arm, touching his wrist and the back of his hand as he reached in, pulling out the bag. The drawers were another hurdle. Robert had his own drawer for his sweaters and that, but the underwear drawer was shared. Aaron eyed Robert’s neatly folded boxer briefs, trying not to picture Robert in them, or his hands helping him out of them.

He sat on the edge of the bed, biting his lip, one hand still holding the open sports bag beside him.

That was the problem. He knew how much Robert wanted him. You just couldn’t fake that. But all the denial? He couldn’t cope with it. It wasn’t even that he wanted Robert to say it, he just wanted Robert to talk about it, to accept it, accept himself. Otherwise the whole relationship was waiting to blow up, and he couldn’t let himself be a victim of that.

At the gym he lowered the pin on the weights machine for a third time. He’d already done a whole circuit but it wasn’t enough. He knew he’d gone too far, not from the burn in his arms and shoulders, but from the way his heart suddenly raced too hard so that it felt like it had escaped into his chest. He heard the clang as the weight dropped too suddenly, and then the sounds of the music and machinery faded away and everything disappeared into blackness.

They’d given him water to drink and sent him home in a taxi. Robert, arriving at the pub, had seen him get out carrying his kit, seeing how white he was and the rings under his eyes.

He pushed his way into the back room, Chas or no Chas.

‘Where is he?’ he asked. ‘I just saw him come in.’

‘He’s gone to lie down. And no, you’re not going up. He doesn’t want to see you, Robert!’

‘But it’s Friday.’

‘Good for you. You know the days of the week!’

‘Can’t you see what he’s doing Chas? At least if you won’t let me speak to him, you need to, before it’s too late.’

 

On Saturday when Aaron woke at first he wasn’t sure if he could move. This must be what rigamortis felt like, if you were alive to feel it. Now he knew why zombies walked the way they did.

Going downstairs was agony. He felt vaguely dizzy and decided he was probably dehydrated. He poured himself a glass of water from the tap.

‘This is all about Robert isn’t it?’ Liv asked.

Aaron looked at her over the top of the glass as he drank.

‘You look ill! Why won’t you just talk to him and make up?’ She asked.

‘Don’t talk about what you don’t understand, Liv.’

‘Try me.’

Aaron poured himself a second glass of water, frowning.

‘No.’

He went out of the room and limped back upstairs.

 

Later Robert received a text. It was from Liv.

_He’s leaving now, so if you want to talk, maybe you can catch him in the car park._

Aaron saw Robert striding towards him as he put his sports bag in the boot and closed it with a bang.

‘I’m not talking to you Robert! So just do one!’

‘Aaron! Aaron! Just listen to me. I didn’t hit on that girl. I just asked her where the drinks machine was.’

Aaron laughed, shaking his head.

‘And you think that’s what this is about?’

‘Well isn’t it? What else, then?’

Aaron rolled his eyes and climbed into his car. Robert saw him wince as he sat down and reached for the safety belt.

‘Aaron wait!’

 But he slammed the door to the driver’s seat and drove off, tires squealing, leaving Robert, hands in pockets, blinking as he watched him go.

 

On Sunday, Vic found Robert sitting staring into space, his fingers curled over his mouth.

‘What’s going on, then?’

Robert put his hand down, and looked at her.

‘Uh, nothing. Actually. I think I’ve worked it out.’

 

Monday, the gym was crowded again with the after work rush. Just like the week before, when he’d come with Robert. He glanced at the mats, thinking about Robert doing crunches, the feel of his knees under his hands. He frowned, setting the incline on the treadmill, and putting on his earphones. There wasn’t a part of his body that wasn’t aching now, but he knew once he started moving the pain would fade, replaced by heat and then, nothing.

A short while later his eyes were drawn back to mats again. His heart suddenly jumped and he lunged forward to grab the handle at the front of the running belt. Robert was there in his blue T-shirt and shorts, doing sit ups again. His mind whirled. He couldn’t have Robert here, invading this space. He turned the machine off with a frown and walked over.

‘Help me will you?’ Robert lay back panting, elbows out, hands behind his head and his knees bent up.

‘Get a member of staff to help you.’ Aaron looked around. ‘There’s plenty of trainers about the place.’

Robert squinted back at him.

‘I want you.’ He said.

 They stared at each other, until Aaron, shaking his head, looked away.

Robert rolled onto his front and raised himself to his knees and then stood up.

‘Why are you here, Robert?’

‘Cos I want to come home. And I want you to want me to come home.’ But Aaron frowned because as he spoke Robert wasn’t looking at him anymore. Instead his eyes were skimming restlessly over the other people at the gym. He seemed distracted and Aaron felt his heart sink again.

‘Nice words, but…’ Aaron started, but Robert put a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it for a second and suddenly started walking away. Aaron stepped back in confusion, watching him go and then suddenly saw the person Robert was walking towards. It was the bloke who’d punched him the week before.

Aaron hesitated. However angry he was with Robert, he couldn’t just stand by and watch him get hurt again. He followed quickly on his heels.

The bloke was on a cross trainer. His girlfriend was there too on the equipment next to him. As soon as he saw Robert, he jumped off.

‘You again?’  Robert was tall, but this bloke was tall, too, and built up, the muscles on his arms glistening from his work out. ‘Back for more?’

Robert stood his ground and raised his hands.

‘I’m not looking for trouble.’ He started. He glanced at Aaron.  ‘I just wanted to set the record straight. I didn’t hit on your girlfriend, mate. I’m not even interested, not that she’s not nice looking or anything, I mean. Congratulations.’  Aaron closed his eyes, feeling like he was watching a train crash in slow motion. He could see the other bloke's face starting to color.

‘Just, what I mean is I said I’m not gay, and I’m not gay, but I am his boyfriend.’ He looked at Aaron’s face, searching his eyes. ‘I mean, I’m bi… I’m bisexual. And I’m in love with him. And I always will be.’

Robert exhaled, feeling his shoulders suddenly loosen. It was out there. He felt Aaron’s hand reach up and touch him softly on the back, turning he saw Aaron nod at him, and he smiled, giving a quick nod back.

 

They lay on the bed, Robert’s hand on the curve of Aaron’s chest, his palm stroking against the hard nub of his nipple.

‘Why couldn’t you have just said something before?’

‘I think it took time for me to work it out, you know? And then I wanted to. But there was never the right time. And you kept saying I was gay. I didn’t realize you needed to hear it as much as I needed to say it. I think, I think I thought you might be upset. I’m sorry, Aaron.’

Aaron turned his neck, watching Robert’s face.

‘It was what I thought anyway for a long time, and then, I don’t know, there was all that stuff about being straight and then you started going on about other blokes and so at some point I just started thinking you were gay and just in denial, stuck back in that closet.’

‘Well I was in denial. But I’m not now, am I?’

Robert moved his hand slowly down Aaron’s stomach, caressing him with his fingers as he went. He moved up over him, onto his elbows, pushing his legs between Aaron’s thighs, and saw him close his eyes with pain as his legs stretched. Robert reached down and curved his hand over the developed muscle of Aaron’s thigh, moving upwards over his skin.

‘I don’t want you to work out so much.’

‘I know. I’ll stop.’

‘Well.’ Robert added, leaning back to get a better view of his boyfriend’s body. ‘You don’t have to actually stop, unless you think you need to. Just pull it back to two days a week, and I might even join you. If you want me to.’

Aaron smiled. He reached between them and found Robert’s cock, hard, his length already thickened, ready to go a second time. He moved his hand over the silky foreskin.

‘Speaking of pulling back.’ He winked and started to tug at him, pulling the skin back and down, then up again, making Robert gasp with pleasure. Aaron shifted down, wincing, opening himself up and Robert stroked his entrance with his fingers, watching Aaron’s eyes narrow and his mouth open in anticipation. He replaced Aaron’s hand on his cock with his own, then lined up and pushed inside. He raised himself up onto his knuckles, watching himself disappear with each thrust inside.

‘Aaron!’ He breathed. ‘You have to know how much I want you, how much you turn me on.’

‘I know.’ Aaron smiled. He did. He’d always known.

Then Robert went faster and felt Aaron’s fingers digging hard into his back as he came close. He felt himself going over the edge, until they were both coming together.

After they lay side by side, shoulders touching.

 

 ‘Say what you said at the gym again.’

‘I’m bisexual.’

Aaron closed his eyes, hiding a smile.

‘Not that bit. Though that bit’s great. The other thing you said.’

Robert shifted over onto his front, onto his elbows, wetting his lips with his tongue.

‘I’m in love with you, Aaron, and I always will be,’ he said.

He watched Aaron’s face.

‘So, aren’t you going to say something back?’

‘You already know it.’

'Then maybe you can show me, instead.’  Reaching down Robert pulled at the sheet and lifted it up right to the headboard over both their heads, he leaned down in the white space and kissed his boyfriend.


End file.
